My favourite side effect of Lovan (that’s the antidepressant) is loss of libido; it completely eliminates it and makes life for a single woman so much easier. It’s back and I don’t want it! I’m almost tempted to increase my dose just so I get the side effect back and also to upset my stomach again so I can’t eat and keep losing weight – I’ve stagnated at -11kg. I am currently attracted to one man, who I’d say is in my league, but I think he deserves better than a scarred, insane, sometimes suicidal, B.P.D girl; I was thinking about that last night and realised that all I really deserve is an unemployed drunken abusive lout - they say girls marry similar to their father (though mine is a hard worker). Life with me is going to be a punishment, the man I like deserves reward; a man like my father deserves me. It almost makes sense to give up the faith, give up the idea of monogamy and shag whoever I please, I could never do that, but I wonder if the end result may be better.
keep labelling yourself and you are going to end up a lonely bitter old woman. No one wants to put up with an attitude like that. Its got nothing to do with the 'labels' you put on yourself. Most of us look for attitude, so what, you are chemically unbalanced, doesn't mean that you are any less desirable than the next female. But when you start spouting that crap about labels, that's what makes you unattractive. Then again if you think all you deserve is an unemployed drunken abusive lout, then that's what you will settle for.
ReplyDeleteBen
Don't worry, I didn't marry someone like my dad. Thank God!!! Definitely didn't want my husband treating me the way my dad treats people. So have hope! :)
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