How to Self Destruct Completely

My parents’ bathroom scales are broken so when I went to M’s house on Tuesday I used his; it was the first time I’d weighed myself since a few days before going to hospital... I’ve gained 6 kilos, and I wouldn’t be surprised if all 6 of them have been gained in the three weeks I’ve been here. I went for a walk most days when I was in hospital, and while I was snacking more than I should it wasn’t too bad. Since being out I have not done any exercise; it’s too ugly and windy out here in the West. I don’t want to walk in this environment and I’ll probably get murdered if I do (though that could be viewed as a plus at the moment), so instead of reducing my intake of crap to make up for the lack of movement I’ve gone the other way and given in to every whim that comes my way at any time of the day or night. At the rate I’m going if I don’t want to look out of place standing beside my next boyfriend I’ll have to get acquainted with those trying for the worlds fattest man title.

I’ve just returned from the local supermarket, where my belief that the world is best viewed through a closed window whilst seated in a corner hiding under a blanket was confirmed. Every person I laid eyes on looked stupid, you know how sometimes you can just look at someone and tell that they can’t count past 20, it was like that, and they kept standing close and getting in my way. One huge woman walked past me stinking of cigarettes and the distinct aroma of I haven’t showered for three months combined. The pharmacist screwed up my prescription and people in the car park clearly didn’t know how to drive, they just sat there clueless. I’m now sitting on my bed with my warm laptop on my lap (of all places) and lovely Lester beside me, why would I ever want to go outside again.

                                                       Reunited